Big Enough Couch

I try not to be judgmental.  But I am flawed and always leave a new client’s home with inklings of what really goes on behind that front door.  Sometimes it’s the nervousness of the interview, sometimes, more is revealed by the fact that all the interior doors are closed and the pets have been sequestered in the main room for my benefit. My “gut feelings” are played out over the course of my employment.  Once, and only once, did I resolve that I knew everything about my client by her choice of furniture; in particular, a lovely teal leather couch.

The missus and I were well acquainted as she was my daughter’s second grade teacher.  I had been a substitute teacher in her classroom and knew her to be easy going and one who frequently gave in to non- traditional and creative methodology.  Life was fun and learning about it left her students not wanting the weekend to interrupt class.

So now, I had the privilege to meet (in no particular order) Roxie, Zach, Heidi and Willow:  Dachshund, Dachshund, Dachshund and long hair Chihuahua. Willow, the Chihuahua,  was the "grand" dog as their daughter (away at college), left her in the care of Mom and Dad. The "plus" one didn't seem to know she wasn't a Doxie...they were equal in the eyes of their people. Four doggies were all vying for attention.  Interview went exceedingly well and I knew I had passed inspection. They had the run of the entire house,. Two of the bedrooms had been converted into work/hobby areas. Repairing clocks was his hobby-the collection of working and non working included grandfather clocks, Big Ben chimers, Cuckoo variety and ones which also indicated the barometric pressure. Hers was computers-she loved the challenge of dis assembly!   The hobbies spilled out into the back yard, where she honed her skills as a master gardener and the garden gnomes, who resided there, never wanted to leave home.

Upon arrival, they were all behind a baby gated kitchen entryway.  Oh, the commotion! They couldn’t get to me and they WANTED to get to me.  I was cleaning up kibble which had been scattered in the excitement for several minutes after I had let them outside.  I joined them and we played follow the leader all around the flowers.  Their grassy area was limited and each took their turn as duty called. Except Zack, being the only male, he was allowed to sprinkle as he walked along.  Neighbor’s dog was out and wanted in on the fun, but I clapped my hands and announced that we’re heading in.

First visits are longer than usual, because my purpose is to get acquainted; on their terms without supervision from the client. It doesn’t take long to understand the hierarchy and if the companion is just one, I allow for extra getting to know me time. While I was being investigated, I took the time to familiarize myself with fuse box, lights on timers,  locating the fire extinguisher, Parmesan cheese (for fussy eaters), laundry detergent (just in case) and toilet plunger.  An odd list to be sure, but as you will see, the whereabouts of these essentials play out in future stories.

Scavenger hunt completed, it was time to tackle the television remotes. I find it simply unnerving that the  getting up from a chair to turn the channel has been replaced by gadgetry and manuals to understand the gadgetry and toll free numbers to speak with those who understand the language of the manuals. Sometimes, as in this case, simple 3 step how to instructions had been left on sticky notes on the television screen.  Great!  Let’s get comfortable for a while and just let it be.

Well, the getting comfortable was problematic because I was sitting on the couch.  No one had told me NOT to sit there.  So I moved to the Barcalounger, raised the foot rest and noticed four pairs of eyes lined up in total disbelief. Okay, I moved once more to a stiff rocking chair, re-positioned it first, sat back and contemplated. Something was not quite right. I had offended the dogs.

No worries, I’d try again.  So I sat on the couch, at the end, nearest the coffee table.  Interest piqued from Willow and she joined me. Three remained on the floor in protest.  I slid down to the middle cushion.  Heidi went straight to the lounger and after plumping the afghan throw to suit her, burrowed in and went to sleep.  Zach and Roxy moved closer but were still not satisfied with the arrangement.

Maybe it was the television.  Maybe this should be quiet time without competition from the electronic babysitter.  So I reached for a quilt and pillow and stretched out to my full 5 foot 4 inch silhouette. That was acceptable. Two joined me; Zach at the small of my back and Roxy on the top edge of the sofa to gaze outside through the locked storm door. This dance of logistics was the last hurdle to complete trust that first visit. We drifted to dreams, albeit, different dreams and snoozed comfortably together through the combined voices of the clocks for the next few hours.

I judge that morning as a complete success.  I give the Missus thumbs up for her intuition in realizing that her dogs deserve the comfort of the best piece of furniture in the house. For many years, I shared the best naps of my career on a beautiful teal leather couch.